Accept not always having a “tidy” home. Before Rory came our house was always what felt like “in order.” I always could walk into a room and have that sense of calm. This was because I had time to make it that way. It makes me happy to have a tidy home. Andy and I had time to pick up the random items, fold the laundry and clean dishes and put them away constantly. After Rory was born our house became what felt like more cluttered each day. My clothes are now everywhere because I often take my shirts off to breastfeed. Burp rags, baby socks, and clothes are everywhere. In all honesty, it probably isn’t that awful but it’s different than what our “normal” was before a baby. I’ve learned it’s ok and to accept it. The baby is a priority. Tidying up will happen in time.
Adjusting to a new normal is challenging. I was so used to my life before Rory. Before Rory, the only concern I had was the actual birth. I didn’t really think past birth and about what life would be like with a baby at home. I figured I’d still be able to do the things I wanna do. When we got home with Rory, there was a huge adjustment period. In this period you need to give yourself so much patience and praise. It’s hard to adjust and merge your life before baby and after baby. I was so thankful Andy was able to be home and support our family during this time but it was still hard. I wasn’t able to work out when I wanted, cook when I wanted, read when I wanted, or do the things I wanted WHEN I WANTED. You hear about the adjustment period but it doesn’t become real until you experience it. It’s challenging and the first 4 weeks are the hardest. But I promise it gets better and you learn a new groove and schedule.
Time is so precious and valuable. Whenever I have a free moment now, I use it 100 percent more efficiently than I did before Rory. There’s not as much free time anymore and with that said, I need to really prioritize what I want to be done. An example I’ve adjusted to: The laundry can wait, working out NEEDS to happen so I can set myself up for a positive day. I rarely fold laundry now and it’s ok. It’s not a high value on my time right now. And know that working out will look much different with baby….use the baby as extra weights during a workout!
Connect with people. You’ve probably heard this before but seriously, connect with people! It will keep you sane. Being a new parent is hard. Reaching out to other people going through the same thing as you is so helpful. I reached out to old friends, friends on Facebook, friends of friends, and people who reached out to me just letting me know they can be a support system if I need it. Take advantage of this! You have so many questions as a new parent and though you wish you did, you do NOT have all the answers. Your support system is there for you, they’ve been through it before. Talk to them because it is OK to feel tired, awful, crappy, and burnt out. Connecting with people will recharge your mindset.
If you are pumping, you should get a pumping bra. I watched many YouTube videos of things to get before having a baby and a pumping bra came up. I rolled my eyes at that thinking it was so unnecessary. After pumping for two weeks without a pumping bra and holding the suctions to my boob for 20 minutes at a time, I realized it was needed. It’s totally appreciated. If you’re like me and trying to save money where you can, you might roll your eyes too. But with a pumping bra I can read, write, hold Rory, pet Daisy, eat, hydrate, and do normal things in that time now, and like mentioned previously, time is precious. I suggest budgeting for this. It’s amazing.
Go on a walk every day! In the first month, especially during COVID, I felt very trapped in the house. The first time we went walking after bringing Rory home felt so freeing! I hadn’t been out of the house in 4 days. Get out on a walk just for fresh air, a change of pace, and to move. It makes a world of difference for your own well-being plus it benefits baby!
We are on this journey together.
What are some things you’ve learned as a new parent?
Peace, love, and hike thru life!